Jokes / One liners

I think Jackson should have a new survey.

What should we do with illegal immigrants?

A. 12 Years Hard Labour.

B. Indefinite Detention.

C. Shoot them all.

C would be the cheapest. My vote.

THE ESSENCE OF CHUTZPAH.

A little old lady sold pretzels on a street corner for 25 cents each. Every day a young man would leave his office building at lunch time, and as he passed the pretzel stand, he would leave her a quarter, but never take a pretzel.

And this went on for more then 3 years. The two of them never spoke. One day, as the young man passed the old lady's stand and left his quarter as usual, the pretzel lady spoke to him.

"Sir, thank you for your business. You are a good customer, but I have to tell you that the pretzel price has gone up to 35 cents."

Sid,

I sent what you wrote to my friends and someone sent this answer to me and all my friends, even though I used BCC. (Blind Carbon Copy) I guess you cannot hide who your friends are.

"No, you don't get it, and if you don't stop believing what you hear on Right-wing radio you never will.

Illegal immigrants don't get social security cards, don't get welfare, and dDon't get food stamps. They can get AFDC (aid for families with dependent children) and food stamps FOR THEIR CHILDREN, IF their children are U. S. Citizens. And anyone can get limited medical attention in emergency rooms, in any industrialized nation in the world.

If you really object to illegal immigration, if it's not just a problem you have with non-white people, support fining and / or jailing illegal employers. The illegal immigrants will go home. Problem solved."

[QUOTE=Sidney]Ok. I think I get it.

Let me see if I understand all this.

If you cross the North Korean border illegally you get 12 years hard labor.

If you cross the Iranian border illegally you are detained indefinitely.

If you cross the Afghan border, you get shot.

If you cross the turkey border illegally, you spend the rest of your life in prison!

But, if you cross the USA border illegally you get:

A drivers license.

A social security card.

Welfare.

Food stamps.

And, free health care?

Oh well sure. That makes perfect sense.[/QUOTE]

Sidney,

There seems to be a flaw in the quiz. It described me as a liberal!

Your friend Steve

What's black and white and red all over? A skunk with a really really bad rash.

No, a terrible joke, I know. But it wasn't political hyperbole at least!

Ok, although Sydney's latest post was not exactly a joke, it was a source for a bit of humor (unlike the previous batch! Sorry Sid!

I had to go take the test. I scored 100% in both personal and economic as a Libertarian! I knew it!

"LIBERTARIANS support maximum liberty in both personal and economic matters. They advocate a much smaller government; one that is limited to protecting individuals from coercion and violence.

Libertarians tend to embrace individual responsibility, oppose government bureaucracy and taxes, promote private charity, tolerate diverse lifestyles, support the free market, and defend civil liberties."

Amen.