Dickhead's Maria

[Dickhead]

Anybody who gets a false María after all the info and description I have posted did not do their homework. I am glad that my friend has her own section and that I, El Toro Rojo, have taken an innocent girl from the wilds of Argentina and elevated her to world-wide fame.

Treat her well but don't spoil her. She won't be back until well after New Year's Day, though.

[Stormy]

Let's not exaggerate the problem of finding Maria or the false Marias. There are only a couple of women who claim to be her. Many of the other women are her friends and will tell you that she has not come in yet or has gone off with a customer and they will give her a message. However, they have customers themselves and may not be around to pass on a message, for a while. She is often around there until 3 AM. Chances are, if you are a gringo and walking through there, if she is there, she will come bounding up to you with a big smile and greet you with the Spanish equivelant of "Hi, Sailor".

[Razor]

I had taken pictures of Maria, but I just don't want to put here, because she told me not to do that, even so her understanding of the Internet is almost nothing. I remenber when she told that she never being in a airplane, is that of kind of girl is, so wonderful in her simplicity. A beauty, actually I told her she looks a little bit like Maria Conchita Alonzo, the cuban-venezuelan actress.

Razor

[Stormy]

Regarding Maria and pictures on the internet -

I asked her about that, if she wanted any pictures taken and put up on the internet and she emphatically said no. The publicity was okay, apparently, but she didn't want a picture there.

Stormy

[Dick for Brains]

To Stormy's point regarding the "counterfeit" Marias floating around Floriday and Paraguay:

She mentioned that I should not have come up to her and asked if she knew who Maria was. She proposed that I walk up to a girl, introduce myself and ask their name (don't lead the witness.)

I strongly recommend this approach for all first-time Maria seekers. This way we can stop the counterfeiting.

Remember Maria gives out cards for Pub Chicote. She uses the Nomme de Guerre of "Maria" (her real name is something other than Maria) which appears on the back of the cards that she hands out.

If you follow the directions from earlier posts you should have no problem finding her if she's not already occupied.

Why doesn't somebody just post her photograph? It doesn't have to be a nude shot, or even a body shot. Just a portrait would be sufficent.

Jackson

[Stormy]

Maria

I saw Maria a number of times in October and November and really do recommend her for all the reasons suggested by Dick for Brains below. I do disagree with DfB on her appearance; I think she is very pretty, but dresses down due to a long and possibly dangerous commute each day. To me she looks as good or better than the club girls or the internet girls that I have seen.

She is not a GFE; as DfB has indicated she is a giver, not a receiver, and likes to direct the action. She is an oral wonder; totally focused on satisfying her clients.

She is tall, about 5' 7" and often wears high heeled boots that make her taller. She usually wears levis and a red or white top. She has beautiful, long black hair and a lovely smile. She does not drink or smoke. She is intelligent and really a nice person.
She is a single parent.

Maria is really concerned with safety. She will go to hotels or to the love hotel which is close by, which is fine. She is very hesitant to go to apartments until she knows the client. The easy solution there, if you are in an apartment, is to use the love hotel the first time or so. She is very good about keeping apointments; the only time she was late was when her train ran late or if there was a child care issue.

Some local men and a few Europeans have been very mean; most of the North Americans and Australians are just fine as clients. There have been a couple of women who identify themselves as "Maria" in the area where she works and drive her nuts. The test is if she comes up to you and asks about "El Toro Rojo", that is her. If she does not have an ID card that says she comes from Santiago Del Estero, that's not her.

The anal activity reported by Razor is a new thing. She always indicated previously that it was too uncomfortable.

If you want to fly Air Maria, just lay back and let her drive, in my opinion. This is probably as good as blow jobs get in BA.

Stormy

[Razor]

Maria

I just come back from my one week trip to Bs.As. and I was happy to meet finally Dickhead's Maria, nice provincial girl, very down-to- earth provider, she seems an innocent woman, anyway I spend my last two days or I'd said my last two evenings with her. Every thing was as DH said, the incredible BJ, massage and great company with a simple girl, agree with previous poster, she's not a great kisser, but I was able to to get her in some greek connection, not easy, but after some slow beginning, I went all the way on her, later she told me that "entregar la colita" was not her thing, but it was OK with me. She spend about two hours with me, we talk about many things, one topic were about how the portenas are so stalk up in relation with people from the interior cities (provincias). Mi second evening was even better, because i was able to get more action from her, some small show of strip-tease, greater love positions, and greek (she was more confortable), actually I pounded her for about good 10 minutes legs up on my shoulder until I exploded deep on her, What an end for my trip.

I really recommended Maria to anyone who want to try a sincerely and honest girl.

[Dick for Brains]

[Maria]

Maria,

I want to chime in on the perpetual discussion regarding Dickhead's Maria. I just got back from a two week jaunt in BA and had the privilege of seeing Maria on the first Friday night (12/??) of my trip.

I was walking around the area of Galerias Pacifico heading north on Florida from Catedral towards Cordoba after seeing a show and having dinner at Cafe Tortoni (highly recommended) in Centro. Tortoni, I believe is the oldest cafe in BA and has a magnificent interior and excellent Lomo.

I recall from an earlier post that Maria hung out around Paraguay, a block north of Cordoba on Florida. Specifically, I found her sitting down with a friend, at the last store on the left (West) side of Florida, just south of Paraguay. I walked up to these two girls and asked if anyone knew Maria after which this delightful woman said that she was Maria and then asked if I was a friend of "El Toro Rojo."

It turns out that Maria hands out little cards for a nearby Boliche and I believe this is the source of most of her income. She mentioned to me that not too many people have come by as referrals of Dickhead ("ETR") and was fascinated when I translated some of the reports of her that I had cut and paste onto a cheat sheet which I had carried around BA.

She was very proud to be famous on the Internet.

I must agree with much of what Dickhead has already said regarding Maria. She is not the most beautiful woman in BA by any stretcch of the imagination. Her buttocks could not be called firm. She is not the best kisser or the most passionate lover. What Maria is is someone who excels in wanting to please her man.

Our first discussion centered on where to go. Should we go back to my hotel in Palermo (see report under hotel section) or at a short stay hotel in the area? She was willing to do either. We could check out the short-stay hotel nearby and if I didn't like it we could head back to Palermo.

She also offered to do a three-some with her friend at the same price. We had agreed that if we went to the short stay, it would be $100AR for up to 2 hours, and this would include the hotel cost which she would cover. Alternatively, if we went to my hotel in Palermo, it would be $80AR but then I would pay for her taxi back. In either case, I could either go with Maria alone or with Maria and her friend at the same price. I asked her why she would do this. She replied that it was a slow night and I guess she and her friend do this as a way of "diversifying risk."

I decided to go with Maria alone and we decided to check out the short-stay. It was a great facillity. Very clean. Fully-windowed shower which I prefer so that you can keep an eye on your belongings while showering. The facility also provided clients with two toothbrushes, toothpaste pre-applied on the brush. Mirrored ceilings, porn movies -- the works. We decided to stay.

After showering, we DFKed for a while. As hinted at previously, I don't think Maria is the best kisser I've ever had. It actually appeared dispassionate. She seemed more interested in almost keeping a little distance, focusing purely more on my pleasure, keeping her own pleasure at bay.

After some kissing, Maria gave me a lap dance, got me interested, told me to lie back and provided the best bbbj I have ever had. As I believe DH as previously reported, Maria knows how to work a man, maintain the erection, keep a man on edge for as long as possible, withdrawing when near climax, fingered my asshole expertly and kept me going for over a half an hour. The bj was absolutely perfect.

After I came, we spoke a bit more about the website, how I had heard of her. She told me a bit of her story. I believe she said that her husband died in a car (or motorcycle) crash. (I'm a little confused on this, for another provider from Madahos told me a similar story - one or the other's husband died in a car crash and the other in a motorcycle crash. Perhaps this is due to the shortage of Stop signs at intersections in BA.)

All in all, Maria was a great provider for someone who wants to lie back and have a woman do all of the work. While I didn't have the opportunity to penetrate her, I didn't get the sense that she was the greatest of lays as she was the greatest of head-givers.

Consistent with earlier reports, Maria confirmed that she works every night other than Sunday, after 9pm at the corner described above. She did give me her phone number but asked me not to print it on the web as she preferred to meet her clients in person the first time.

All visitors to BA should visit Maria at least one time on their trip.

Highly recommended.

Okay, that's it.

One more Maria report and she will qualify for her own section.

Jackson

[Dickhead]

[Maria]

OK, lads, I booked another trip arriving March 7 thru March 13. Dazzler unavailable for all dates so will be staying at its sister hotel, the Bisonte Palace (Suipacha and Marcelo T. Alvear). I booked a second name of Norma J Baker (Marilyn Monroe's real name for those who are unaware) so ask for Ms. Baker's room if you want to hang out with a Dickhead. This trip is with frequent flyer miles so I should have a bit more cash so perhaps I will actually try some of the clubs. Plus I have free pussy lined up (well, we know there is no such thing but should be pretty close after all the groundwork I have done) and that should cut the expenses somewhat.

This is an excellent location in that it is only three blocks from Maria the human vacuum cleaner and Karen the ultra tight chocha. I think I will have them both Day 1. Of course, it would be a shame if they were temporarily unavailable because it is very difficult to find women there, almost as difficult as finding a turd in an outhouse.

I don't make much money but God I love my job for having so much free time. Money can't buy poverty.

[Dickhead]

[Maria]

Originally posted by Guillermo
Dickhead, me Boy-o! Sure and you've got a heart o' gold and a shillelagh of iron. May the wind be always at your back and the road always lead downhill to your next BBBJ.

I take it from your posts that every female in BA over the age of 18 is proposition-able. Would you say that's a safe assumption?

Guillermo

Well, it is a Dickhead assumption. I don't know if it is a SAFE assumption. Like, I hit on the clerk at the kiosko but only when her husband was in the back room and there was no way she was going for it, and the breakfast buffet girls weren't going for it, but I don't think there's much harm in asking. I really never realized until now that the girls handing out the cards for the tittie bars are hooking. I asked Maria why she didn't work at Hooks or Ness or somewhere and she said they wanted too much of a cut.

I am back in the US now and have been awake for about 40 hours straight.

[Dickhead]

[Maria]

Originally posted by saint
Just a quick update. No offense to Dickhead but anyone that is missing the clubs at night is making a MAJOR mistake. The clubs are where it's at. There are a lot of hot chicks at the club. You can get tons of phone numbers from the club girls. BA is VERY slow now though. I'm glad I'm in Rio now. I've been posting my Rio adventures in that section but anyone that comes here and doesn't go out to the clubs is missing out.

But have your own fun. Do what makes you happy. It's all about having fun. The clubs in BA are different than anywhere in the world. Also, it is a late night town so if you're not used to that then sleep during day so you have energy at night.

Have fun. I come back to BA tomorrow.

Saint

No offense taken. Very hard to offend a Dickhead which is part of the fun. But what you say is part of the problem. I have problems with insomnia at times and it kicked in pretty bad here although it's been OK the last few days. And, I cannot sleep during the day no matter what. Hard to believe but true. Eye shades, ear plugs, pounding drinks, tried it all.

But, I mean, I would have gotten around to the clubs if I hadn't been getting SO MUCH PUSSY without going there and I do appreciate the reviews. I don't have your kind of money as I am in an underpaid and underappreciated profession by choice that provides ample time to travel. I don't care how hot the clubs are because I know for sure that there is not a better value in the world, anywhere, than Maria for an asking price of 80 pesos. Unless I have a math fart somewhere that is 25 dollars for two loads, deep throat, no time pressure, every position I could think of, DATY, BBJCIM (which I couldn't). Yeah, I gave her 100 pesos instead but she would have sucked my dick down to the root regardless. I think if you add up door fees and chica drinks and cab fare home (which she did not ask for) I am on the right track. Also those who hang out in the clubs will have the additional expenses related to lung cancer and will not be able to outrun the youth gangs. If her body is not a 9 I don't know what is and it is a 10 to me because I don't care if she has 40 inch hooters. (Did I mention I like women with small tits and women with big tits and women with medium tits and women whose tits have been gnawed off by coyotes?)

Speaking of 1 to 10, I have 15 minutes before my cab arrives so I would like to provide two useful alternatives to the traditional 1| to 10 scale.

The first we will call the Dickhead scale in my honor. I deserve some honor from this trip; in fact I am thinking of having my dick bronzed. The Dickhead scale ranges from 0 to 5.

0 = a woman you would not fuck or eat.
1 = a woman you would fuck but not eat.
2 = a woman you would fuck or eat.
3 = a woman you would eat and then fuck.
4 = a woman you fuck and then eat.
5 = a woman you would eat after your buddy just fucked her.

Haven't seen any fives yet but they may be out there.

The second scale we will call the Budweiser scale; this corresponds to the number of Clydesdales it would take to drag her off your face.

Your faithful servant,

DH

[Dickhead]

[Maria]

FINAL REPORT AND CLOSING THOUGHTS

I leave tonight and I am already starting to bum out. Maria called promptly on schedule last night and I had my way with her (well, really, a lot of it was her way, which is a damn good way) for hours and fucking hours. This gal is Linda Lovelace reincarnated. She can suck for half an hour nonstop. I had taken the last of the four Viagra (I definitely get a headached 10 or 15 minutes after I take it; kinda reminds me of amyl nitrate) and I laid some serious pipe on this gal. Finally got off aftre about three hours. We went out to eat. I asked her if she wanted to go to Pippo's and she said I didn't have to take her to a fancy restaurant and just someplace for a sandwich was fine with her.

Well, I wouldn't really call Pippo's a fancy restaurant although I do recommend it (there are two I know of, Santa Fe and Callao and Corrientes also near Callao) but it was closing so we went went elsewhere. She is pretty naive as far as she did not understand what I was doing when I pulled her chair out for her. If I wanted to open a door for her I had to hurry; she's just not used to it.

Then back to the hotel and more fuck and suck. She did not know those words in English (imagine a hooker who does not understand sucky fucky!) so I taught her several useful phrases such as blow job, suck your dick, very good head, etc. This is part of Dickhead's professional development series. I educated her about escorts b-aires and the like and encouraged her to get on the internet so as not to waste time on the street (she said a lot of nights go by without a customer). I said look, if you are handing out flyers for a tittie bar a lot of guys won't be forward enough to say how 'bout you instead? (In other words, there just aren't enough Dickheads to go around). I hope she takes the advice but I doubt she will. I showed her some of the pics of Gabriela and Elani and said look you are way better than these girls and they charge more. I gave her 250 pesos for a 6 hour session, plus some little gifts of toiletries and the like. She especially liked the fact that I had some new toothbrushes available so be sure to pack plenty.

Also I went through an unbelievable number of condoms. I had packed what I perceived to be a ridiculously optimistic amount and I almost ran out. The ones here are not as good so bring plenty of those. All the girls appreciated the flavored condoms for blow jobs, at least those who were so inclined to use them at all for blow jobs. Karen and Maria don't. Actually I got at least some BBBJ from everyone except Elani and street girl Monica (whose odometer had turned over too many times for me to want that anyway).

I never felt unsafe in any of the areas I went to. I took a cab to Marta's place near Plaza de Miseres and the cab driver recommended quite strongly several times that I watch my ass and this was in the daytime. I didn't think it was anything that nasty but night time might be another story. I wandered the side streets late at night every night. One night a group of 4 youths were fairly aggressive in requesting moneda and followed me for about half a block. I was getting pretty close to putting the pedal to the metal (I was a sprinter in high school and I can still burn pretty good at 45 after four knee surgeries) but they backed off. I also did not run into the problem another poster mentioned about a lack of small bills. I brought 65 US $1 bills and 15 $2 bills and never really needed them although the $2 bills were quite popular. Only once did anyone ask me for a smaller bill.

Oh well, now it is back to the land of squishy bread and squishy women.

My sole and only caveat about this town is that it is too hot and I wish I had come in March instead. I am supposed to go to Mexico in March but I may come back here instead.

I hope my fellow posters have found my posts useful and that I have discharged my obligation to the board sedulously.

Dickhead

[Dickhead]

[Maria]

Day 2 (yesterday). BTW, Andres, ´normal position´´ is MISSIONARY.

Typical tourist activities until about 6 PM. Nap, then called Maria Cristina, Eliana, and Anael. Machine, recording, not available, respectively. Figured I'd have dinner and try again. Walking E on Paraguay across Nueve de Julio, saw the same woman I'd seen the previous evening on the same bench, therefore determined to be hooker for sure. Cute face but a cigarette hanging out of her mouth and about 5 years past the sell by date.

After dinner and some wandering around, I headed back towards the Dazzler to call some more chicas. Same gal was on same bench, joined by another, younger buxom blond who was quite cute but about 10 kilos over the weight limit.

So I did the math. 5 years plus 10 kilos times two hookers raised to the power of one Dickhead equals 40 pesos, which is what I had in my pocket. I sat down between them on the bench and went into my act entitled "No One Could Possibly be This Much of a Dickhead." We quickly determined that either one could be had for 40 pesos (although the madatory initial quote of 100 was met with the mandatory hysterical laughter) and both could be had for 60. They said they had a room nearby. I said I wasn't about to do that in that neighborhood. They promised not to rob me. I wasn't too worried about the 40 pesos in my pocket but was a bit concerned about the approximately $800 worth of dollars, Euros, and pesos that were adhesive taped inside my socks (Dickhead doesn´t trust hotel safes). I said "Look, all I have is 40 pesos and let´s go in that parking lot behind that van and you (the older thin one, Monica) suck me off while I play with your (Susanna, the younger fat one) tits."

They thought that was pretty funny. I said I liked doing it "en el aire libre." They said something about policia. I said ten minutes max and no one will have their clothes off so how about it. I pointed out to Monica that she had been sitting there for several hours and sitting is in no way remunerative. What I was also thinking but not saying was that she wasn´t getting any younger sitting there either. So they suggested the underground parking lot, I countered with the bushes in the esplanade, and finally we decided to go behind the van.

I had been telling Monica that she had to suck really hard and not just lick. Boy, did she take that seriously. I doubt very severely that this woman is a casualty of the recent economic crisis; an obvious life long hooker in my estimation. So between her sucking really hard (she, like Gabriela, preferred banana over strawberry; no way did I want BBBJ in this situation) and me sucking on Susana´s big firm tits, the 40 pesos worked out to about 10 pesos per minute and then we were all laughing hysterically and got the fuck out of there.

Conclusion: definitely not recommended unless you are a dirty, sick, perverted bastard with absolutely no self respect. In other words, a Dickhead.

The trouble with blow jobs is they just make me horny for a fuck so that is my current status: horny for a fuck. I am killing time now waiting for the art museum to be open, but I know that by 5 or 6 PM I will be on the phone to the Platynum girls.

I am having a hard time seeing any advantage to going to the clubs and paying covers and buying drinks but I suppose I´ll get around to it eventually. I reconaissanced Recoleta and I think maybe the J & B could be my kind of place, although it was of course empty in the afternoon when I went by.

I just read where Saint said the weather is very mild for January and that really scares me because it is only 10:30 AM or so and I think it is mighty damn hot.

[Jackson]

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