Useful Spanish Phrases for Chicas

[Kevins]

Would you like a new asshole or a new year?

TL.

Thanks for the help Man!

I'm just a computer idiot, or just an idiot?

Bring your little netbook to the dinner and I'll set it there for you.

[TejanoLibre]

There are three common ways."ALT codes","Character Map", and the "International Keyboard". All are software and all are standard MS Windows, so completely free. All are somewhat awkward to use. You should be able to find everything you might want to know about them via Google and Windows Help. If not let me know.

Bob

Would you like a new asshole or a new year?

TL.

Thanks for the help Man!

I'm just a computer idiot, or just an idiot?

[AllIWantIsLove]

I just don't know how to make my American keyboard pull a Spanish N out of it's ass!

TL

There are three common ways."ALT codes","Character Map", and the "International Keyboard". All are software and all are standard MS Windows, so completely free. All are somewhat awkward to use. You should be able to find everything you might want to know about them via Google and Windows Help. If not let me know.

Bob

[TejanoLibre]

Hey TL,

How do you say "Did you know swallowing cum boosts your immune system?"

Thanks,

Che Nena, sabes que si tragas mi leche es muy bueno para tu salud y el sistema immunologico!

That's real close.

Maybe one too many m's or whatever.

They will laugh and balk!

Translation :

Hey Baby, (Chica) did you know that if you swallow my load that it is beneficial to your health and immune system!

I must ask for an apology boys!

After living here for 7 years my English is starting to Brain Fart with my Spanish so I may make an occasional error!

I dream in Spanish and English, it's amazing!

When I took Spanish classes from zero till 12th grade I never used the accents on the words.

I was a Catholic School Altar Boy ! Now Look what happened ! I learned to turn the other cheek when that queer priest pulled up his skirt !

I was happy with 99's and 98's on my test!

Good enough for hand grenades!

Anyway, at times it can make a huge diff!

Feliz ANO Nuevo without the Spanish N means " Happy New Asshole " instead of Happy New Year!

I just don't know how to make my American keyboard pull a Spanish N out of it's ass!

TL

P.S - Today someone asked me if I work for the Devil or am I an Independent !

[Esten]

Hey TL,

How do you say "Did you know swallowing cum boosts your immune system?"

Thanks,

[TejanoLibre]

A Partial List of Useful (to get you laid) Phrases in Spanish :

1.) Cuanto? How Much?

2.) Adonde? Where?

3.) A Que Hora? At What Time? They use military time here so make it clear!

4.) Bucal Sin Globo Hasta El Final En Tu Boca? BBBJ untill I cum in your mouth?

5.) Chupame Los Huevos Por Favor! Please Suck My Balls!

6.) Sos Completa Mi Amor? Do You Take it Up the Ass My Dear?

7.) Quiero que te quedes toda la noche. I want you to stay all night long.

8.) Esta es mi direccion. This is my address, hotel, apt, etc.

9.) Cuanto tiempo y cuanto cuesta? How much time and how much will it cost?

10.) Andate a la mierda! Get the FUCK out of here! (useful at times)

11.) Te quiero mucho mi amor! I like 0r love you very much my dear! (NEVER TO BE SPOKEN)

12.) Estas Loca? Are you Crazy? (normally applied after you receive an outrageous quote!)

13.) A que hora podes venir a mi hotel? What time can you come to my hotel?

14.) Eso es MUY caro, no soy Rico! That's TOO expensive, I'm not rich!

15.) Etc, etc, etc!

Feel free to print this out and use it for texting or conversation.

It is pronounced exactly like it is spelled.

Also, feel free to jump in and add to this.

TL Still Running for President!

P. S.

Che, puta de mierda, ya que termine traeme una cerveza y andate a la mierda!

Hey you fucking *****, now that I'm finished you can bring me a beer and get the fuck out of here!

NO FLAMES GIRLS!

This is a MAN'S Game and that is a JOKE!