"Argentina Private" The Movie

[Daddy Rulz]

What is OPM, Oh Dick-Headed One?

TL

Others People's Money. Brother Dickhead, much like myself, doesn't get in taxi's often. Usually when we do its with people that don't use public transport. Like him I rarely contribute to ride in a car when I can get to the same place as the car for 1. 20 P by using the bus.

[TejanoLibre]

If you are going to put me in the movie it would have to be on the 59 or 152 bus or the red train. Taxis? Only with OPM.

What is OPM, Oh Dick-Headed One?

TL

[Dickhead]

If you are going to put me in the movie it would have to be on the 59 or 152 bus or the red train. Taxis? Only with OPM.

[TejanoLibre]

SS is holding a convention in the city hall, highlighting the various dastardly acts committed by the taxi drivers of BA. The locals and the newbie expat tourists listen to it and tremble with fear. Their are 100's of news reporters from all over the world covering this convention. SS becomes famous as the only honest and sane driver in whole of BA. Everyone clicks the photographs of SS. He is felicitated by the Christina in the same event. At that moment, DH, TM walk in and anounce to the people they have a revelation to make. The people stand still spellbound as to what is about to unfold. TM rants to the crowd that that the two of them have had taken taxis for many years in BA without a incident and advise people not to be afraid to use them. The girls start shrieking in happiness and start tearing off their clothes. The two, TM, DH becomes celebreties overnight and the girls are all falling over them to have sex with them!

In walks TL. And ask the girls not to offer themselves for free. As their are many tourists who are dumb guys, who will pay them 200 us$ for 45 minutes of sex. Suddenly TL is famous in BA. All girls run to him to be taken under his wing. TL has no time to take so many girls. Girls agree to first let him have bareback anal sex with them in order to be chosen by him to be served to the dumb tourists in BA.

To be continued.

How did you know Man?

OK, which Chica talked? Which Chica told you the drill?

You are too funny but it sounds like a Plan to TL! He likes it!

RG for TL

[Member #3320]

Opening scene of the movie.

It is year 2001.

A American airways jet lands at Ezeiza airport. Alights out of it, is a caucasian man, in in 40's, balding head, slightly plump. As he comes out of the airport, he looks at the city and says to himself, one day I am going to be the most famous monger, this world has ever known.

Their is havoc on streets of BA. The currency has devalued overnight. 1 us$ is equal to lots of pesos. 30 us$ in 2001 in BA, is equivalent worth 300 us$ of 2012 in BA.

He checks himself in a small hotel. And hails a taxi. (No SS lives in BA as yet). He tells the taxi driver to take him to the most happening night club of BA. And he is driven to a club called "Black". As he enters the club, he says to himself what was I doing all my life in the sex prison called, USA.

The most good looking girl in Black, a sexy model like girl, 5 ft 10;, big breast, slim waist, pretty face is ready to do a "toda la noche" with him just for 30 us$.He gets laid that night for the first time ever with a non-American woman, and several more times in the course of the week. The gorgeous chica is seen giving him a BBBJ. He is so pleased and satiated. He decides, as he lays in the bed getting the BBBJ, that he will continue to live in BA for rest of his life and form a club called "Argentina Private". Its a just a thought/a idea in his mind for now.

At that moment, his character name is flashed on the screen. Its called "Jackson aka El jefe". People in the cinema hall clap and whistle to his entry. And the titles start rolling in with a nice strip tease kind of music in the background. The movie is called "Argentina Private". It goes on to win all major category academy awards and is a multi-million dollar blockbuster acclaimed both by critics and the public.

[Member #3320]

SS is holding a convention in the city hall, highlighting the various dastardly acts committed by the taxi drivers of BA. The locals and the newbie expat tourists listen to it and tremble with fear. Their are 100's of news reporters from all over the world covering this convention. SS becomes famous as the only honest and sane driver in whole of BA. Everyone clicks the photographs of SS. He is felicitated by the Christina in the same event. At that moment, #3320, TM walk in and anounce to the people they have a revelation to make. The people stand still spellbound as to what is about to unfold. TM rants to the crowd that that the two of them have had taken taxis for many years in BA without a incident and advise people not to be afraid to use them. The girls start shrieking in happiness and start tearing off their clothes. The two, TM, #3320 becomes celebreties overnight and the girls are all falling over them to have sex with them!

In walks TL. And ask the girls not to offer themselves for free. As their are many tourists who are dumb guys, who will pay them 200 us$ for 45 minutes of sex. Suddenly TL is famous in BA. All girls run to him to be taken under his wing. TL has no time to take so many girls. Girls agree to first let him have bareback anal sex with them in order to be chosen by him to be served to the dumb tourists in BA.

To be continued.

[Member #3320]

Got me belly laughing with that one dude! Damn funny if ya ask me. The story continues.

Finally, SS after several fender benders due to erratic driving, drops all of us off at the AP House and Mplexy meets us at the door. Mplexy convinces DH. 3320 and I that we have been underpaying our long term chicas for years and we agree to triple their hourly rate on the spot and let Mplexy watch!

IALOTFLMAO!

Finally, after hours of lascivious activities, Jackson kicks us out but leaves my chicas and lays claim to them, and again doubles their new rate. All the Chicas end up moving in with Jackson and he ends up in a Mormon style polygamous relationship with all of them. We call the sequel, The Jackson Sister Wives.

Happy mongering all. Toymann

Ha! This is undoubtedly the most funny post, I have read on this forum for a long time. Almost fell down the sofa laughing when I read it. It was so funny! Thanks, buddy for the laugh.

[TejanoLibre]

Exon: W. C. Fields.

Jackpot: Burl Ives.

Doggboy: Al Pacino.

Dickhead: Ralph Malph (Happy Days)

Queso: Al Borland (Home Improvement)

Tejano: Cheech Marin

Correction :

Jeff Bridges as Doggboy without a doubt!

TL

[TejanoLibre]

I proposed a sitcom idea a few months back, in a thread discussing antics at the AP House and stripper parties. It would be a sitcom modeled on the successful British series "Fawlty Towers".

It's called Fawlty Poles.

The main characters are the owner El Jefe, the maid, and a man who somehow is always getting into trouble and controversy, but when brought to his attention innocently proclaims,"What. Me?".

Each episode revolves around the going-ons of that week's guests, the recruitment of chicas for the weekly "pole dance", and or course the weekly pole dance event itself. Interspersed are the various arguments amongst the male attendees, the decadent hijinx on-stage and off-stage, and the day-after reflections on what transpired. Occasionally, one of the neighbors makes a guest appearance after a noisy event, with the owner trying to cool things down and keep the peace.

A Documentary would work and would be easy.

Interview the Chicas, the club owners, the mongers and get all sides of the scene.

That could be done.

Someone asked me to do it a few years ago and I put it on the back-burner.

TL

[Esten]

It really would make a hell of a movie or sit-com. It could be like "Friends" but replace Central Perk with Exedra.

I proposed a sitcom idea a few months back, in a thread discussing antics at the AP House and stripper parties. It would be a sitcom modeled on the successful British series "Fawlty Towers".

It's called Fawlty Poles.

The main characters are the owner El Jefe, the maid, and a man who somehow is always getting into trouble and controversy, but when brought to his attention innocently proclaims, "What - Me ?".

Each episode revolves around the going-ons of that week's guests, the recruitment of chicas for the weekly "pole dance", and or course the weekly pole dance event itself. Interspersed are the various arguments amongst the male attendees, the decadent hijinx on-stage and off-stage, and the day-after reflections on what transpired. Occasionally, one of the neighbors makes a guest appearance after a noisy event, with the owner trying to cool things down and keep the peace.

[Esten]

SilverStar Could be played by Jason Statham

Good one! LOL

Your role is to help mongers get to their first session ASAP following arrival at EZE. Gato Hunter used to talk about how fast he could get his first chica after touchdown, and I always thought this could be a good idea for a competition. With you racing down the highway like Statham, the time to beat would easily be somewhere under an hour.

[TejanoLibre]

Stranger: Billy Idol.

Daddy Rulz: Nick Nolte.

Papa Benito: Walter Matthau.

Jackson: Tony Soprano.

Tomoso: Jack Klugman.

I also think the real life stories we've experienced down there trump anything fictional we can conjure up! It really would make a hell of a movie or sit-com. It could be like "Friends" but replace Central Perk with Exedra.

It has it all :

An exotic location, sex, drugs and ex-pats, corruption, white slavery, a hell of a list of the Usual Suspects; I mean I have met hundreds of guys with all kinds of interesting pasts.

How about a Reality Show?

It WOULD work but there goes your privacy!

I don't care!

TL.

Nothing to hide and nothing to lose.

[Tequila Tim]

Exon: W. C. Fields.

Jackpot: Burl Ives.

Doggboy: Al Pacino.

Dickhead: Ralph Malph (Happy Days)

Queso: Al Borland (Home Improvement)

Tejano: Cheech Marin

Stranger: Billy Idol.

Daddy Rulz: Nick Nolte.

Papa Benito: Walter Matthau.

Jackson: Tony Soprano.

Tomoso: Jack Klugman.

I also think the real life stories we've experienced down there trump anything fictional we can conjure up! It really would make a hell of a movie or sit-com. It could be like "Friends" but replace Central Perk with Exedra.

[Toymann]

Great entertainment since it's distorted fiction. My position has never been, not one single post, that any individual ought to pay more, raise their negotiated rates, or somehow the poor chicas have been underpaid. A deal is a deal and whatever you managed to negotiate, long term chicas or not, is fine. If you got what you thought was adequate value, great. If not, live and learn and take that as xp to negotiate better next time.

My point has always been if you feel you got value out of it that suits your needs and budget, that's all that matters and the price police can take a hike.

I wil say though if you're still paying your long term chicas by hourly rate, your "game" must be pretty off.

Sense of humor Mplexy. I assume you have one. If not, whatever! Happy mongering all. Toymann

[Mpexy]

Mplexy convinces DH, 3320 and I that we have been underpaying our long term chicas for years and we agree to triple their hourly rate on the spot

Great entertainment since it's distorted fiction. My position has never been, not one single post, that any individual ought to pay more, raise their negotiated rates, or somehow the poor chicas have been underpaid. A deal is a deal and whatever you managed to negotiate, long term chicas or not, is fine. If you got what you thought was adequate value, great. If not, live and learn and take that as xp to negotiate better next time.

My point has always been if you feel you got value out of it that suits your needs and budget, that's all that matters and the price police can take a hike.

I wil say though if you're still paying your long term chicas by hourly rate, your "game" must be pretty off.